My Blue Gardenia


Deenie’s Diary Entry #5
May 12, 2010, 7:39 pm
Filed under: Uncategorized

I abhor dishonesty…in every way it comes up. I hate being nice to someone who is not nice, pretending to like those that I don’t…pretending to be happy when I’m not. Being a woman in 1959 is all about dishonesty…the way I look, the way I act, the life I lead…dishonesty.

It shakes me to the core, to look at the miracles that happen all around me. I can’t understand how people go through a day without being astonished at the wonder of their own bodies, let alone the perfect interconnection of the trees and the bees and all of it.

I feel like the only person in the world who sees things as they really are. While all the other women around me are flying through their lives buying lipstick and appliances, I can’t stop wondering at the stars.

And they think I’m crazy.

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